======================================
MEDAL GAME WALKTHROUGHS TABLE OF CONTENTS
======================================

This is a walkthrough for REPLAYING :the game:, essentially a small, repeating minigame based on social, national, political, commercial, characterological, abstractional anecdotal commentary by Nutcasenightmare.
The aim of the game is pretty simple. Walk off the stage. Jump off the stage. Crawl off the stage and take a nose dive if you want to. Controls as taken from the game page are:
"Left / Right to Move
Up to Jump
Down to Duck, which had completely no purpose in the last game, and now has company with:
Down + L/R to Crawl
And of course, Alt-F4 for free candy exploding out of your keyboard."
(Not mentioned is the cheat Ctrl-W which can auto-complete any level)

The 4 medals are:

A LITTLE BIRDIE TOLD ME - Go to the Show Appreciation link. Click the blue birdie. Press 'update'. Thanks. (25 points)
Follow those simple instructions. If you are completely heartless and only care about medals, you don't need to bother with pressing update. Just click the birdie and feel satisfied about the 25 medal points you earnt.
BLOODBATH: Kill 150 or more of those buggers in the preloader game. (25 points)
Before pressing the spacebar to start the game, click and hold any of the hopping faceless characters and then throw them. Throw them at each other - it saves time. Rinse and repeat until you've killed at least 150 of them.
THE END: Meaning it's now time for the level editor, level playlist, unlockables, high scores... NO WAIT COME BACK. (100 points)
Finish the last level and sit through the credits. If you've played it before, you can just use level select.
UNLOCK-NESS MONSTER: Unlock everything. You see what I did there with this Medal's title? Lol. (100 points)
Get all the in-game unlockables and then click on the achievement itself in the achievements' unlockables menu. Confused much?

In-game Unlockables:
THE END: See medal.
A LITTLE BIRDIE TOLD ME: See medal.
BLOODBATH: See medal.
THERE IS NO REPLAY: Finish the Atheism level and then click on the replay button (top-right corner). DENIED.
PIECE OF CAKE: On the Epicroll level click the pink-haired girl in the chef's hat. It's OK, the actress is over 18. She's hiding in the ultimate showdown of destiny scene and only appears briefly.
WHERE THE HELL IS MONA: In the Art level, click on the portrait on the third row, eight column. It's pretty obvious that it's the right one though, you can tell because it has pixels.

Difficult levels:
The Gun Control level is like Soviet Russia. You do not kill the witch at the end, the witch kills YOUUU.
The Stock Market level does crash eventually; of course it's going to finish one day. Not 2012 though. Just let it run and go do something else like everyone else. If it really does seem to be glitched, you can skip it on the level select.
The Subprime level. Hold down the spacebar to shit money. Shit money on the houses. Enough so that they're so full of shit that they explode into a barrel of toxic waste. Ron Paul would shit gold, but the bowel movements required are more painful and so he fires gold at the houses, rendering them invulnerable to the crap you're pulling out of your ass. Molten gold also hurts you, but taking a hit could save a precious house. Keep up the bullshit and eventually you'll have a few barrels of toxic waste. Spam Z to fling them at Ron's blimp till it explodes. With all the objects on screen, a crappy computer may explode - so work quickly. Faeces.